I was struck by a feeling of homesickness this afternoon. Most of the time I go about my life without feeling it, yet every now and then it hits me full force.
Being Finnish-Australian, I do add a touch of Finnish into my everyday life in any way I know how.
I have moomins, Marimekko, iittala, aarikka and Pentik adorning my home. I bake pulla, Karelian pies and Finnish coffee cakes. Every now and then I watch Finnish movies and listen to Finnish music. When I get my hands on Finnish Fazer Blue chocolate or salmiakki, I buy some.
But there comes a time when even all that is not enough.
So, I dream. I dream of the beauty of the shores of lake Saimaa, of the fresh earthy smell of its forests. I dream of its winter landscapes and autumn colours. I dream of the hissing sound water makes as it hits the sauna rocks.
I dream of the endless summer nights and the peace of the countryside. I dream of berries eaten straight from the bush, of a bowl full of mämmi, and the taste of archipelago malt and honey bread loaf.
I dream of everything familiar and beautiful that comes from my country of birth. I dream of happiness.
Sometimes all the dreaming is enough to make me smile, but today it made me sad. It filled my heart with homesickness.
The dictionary defines homesickness as: “A feeling of grief and discomfort that is experienced when we miss a familiar environment”.
I realised today, that the country of my birth and all my loved ones there are further away than ever before. They are beyond my reach. I can only hope that next year I will be well enough to travel there again. Until then pea-soup and rye bread will have to do.
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4 Comments Add yours
Not easy…. I like the saying that it is never the end of the story…
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You are right! Pea-soup and rye bread is not the end of the story! Hopefully a lot more to follow! I would LOVE to be able to write to you from Finland one day!
Thank you for visiting my blog earlier. I hope you’re feeling better. Perhaps technology such as Facetime can help you chat with your loved ones in Finland. Homesickness is a form of grief and is not easy to live with. I’ve been to Helsinki to visit my Finnish friend there and she took me to her family cottage. I understand your dream.
How nice to hear you have been to Finland and Helsinki! That’s where I was born!